Absolute Random Nonsense

The date of my written and road test was approaching and I had been studying the driver’s manual. Based on what I had heard from friends who had taken the test, some questions were tricky and during the road test the testing officer would order you to perform illegal moves, for which he would fail you if you obliged. Amir, who had taken and flunked the written test, gave me some last-minute advice and told me about his experience. “Some of the material wasn’t even in the manual. I just guessed or tried to use common sense about it but I figure I got them wrong. One question was about whether you’re permitted to stage mule racing contests on a public street. I think I said no although I perhaps should have gone with the choice where it said you can with prior permission. Another was asking if during bus rides between different cities the bus driver is allowed to turn off the interior lights at night. I said yes because a lot of people sleep during the long rides, especially at night.” T...

An Iranian mother detained by U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement officers was released this week following advocacy from Republican House Majority Leader Steve Scalise. Mandonna "Donna" Kashanian, 64, was detained by ICE officers last month as she gardened in the yard of her New Orleans home. CBS New Orleans affiliate WWL-TV reports that it happened on June 22, the day after U.S. forces bombed Iran. She's lived in the United States for 47 years and her husband of 35 years, Russell Milne, and 32-year-old daughter Kaitlynn are both U.S. citizens. Kashanian had been allowed to stay in the U.S. as long as she checked in regularly with immigration authorities, as she had done without fail, her family and attorney said.  More than 100 of Kashanian's neighbors wrote letters of support for her, which Hilferty told the AP she and Scalise had shared with the Trump administration.  Kashanian arrived in the U.S. in 1978 on a student visa and unsuccessfully applied for asylu...

Years ago I began investigating relationships between numbers like prime numbers, divisibility, and integer-based structures. I manipulated equations, x’s and y’s, with tools from all branches of mathematics, including analysis, probabilities, algebra, and geometry, among others. I applied what I knew about the behavior of integers in general to other specific integers, such as friable integers. After some extended research I came to the conclusion that all odd numbers have the letter "e" in them. Except infinity.  

A grieving Ottawa man is speaking publicly about the loss of his mother after she was fatally stabbed in what police are investigating as a femicide in Barrhaven. “How can you be okay? My mom just got taken away from me,” said 34-year-old Arya Farahani. “It’s not anything that I would hope on anybody. This is literally the worst-case scenario.” Ottawa police have charged 30-year-old Party Shah, Farahani’s younger brother, with second-degree murder and attempted murder following the attack on Ashbourne Crescent on April 23rd. Investigators allege Shah stabbed his mother Farnaz Farahani to death and seriously injured his grandmother Nezhat Lashgari. The allegations have not been proven in court. In an emotional interview, the victim’s eldest son described the moment he learned what had happened. Farahani was on his way to an appointment when he received calls from police detectives asking to speak in person. But it was a friend who shared the news, telling him to pull his car ove...

One day at my old job I told my coworker that the night before I had gone to a restaurant and when I walked in I noticed that everybody was Kung Fu fighting. He mentioned that it must have been really frightening. I responded that it was almost as frightening as his mom's ass. He neither agreed with nor refuted my assessment.  

Bijan Robinson is an American professional football running back for the Atlanta Falcons of the NFL. Contrary to popular belief he is not of Iranian lineage. He was named by his mother after the Iranian fashion designer Bijan Pakzad.  “I embrace the beauty of all women,” Bijan (the fashion designer) said in 2000, sitting in his lush penthouse office across the street from his Rodeo Drive boutique, which was undergoing a $10 million renovation. His recent ad featured a high-heeled, nude Bella and fully clothed Mr. Bijan. The lush Latin colors and the interplay between the two were meant to represent the great paintings from the masters. Bijan had a $1 million budget for the print campaign and submitted the ads to magazines from Elle to Town and Country. All, though they regularly accept his advertisements, refused to publish them. Bijan said he called them and asked whether it was because the model was too heavy. “They said, ‘No, no, no,’ ” he said. 

I once explained to someone how ever since I was young I enjoyed racing. I would normally participate in foot races but would also challenge people to bike races. I would normally such races and boast about it, ruthlessly rubbing it in my opponent's face. The person I was speaking to was not impressed and claimed I was racist.  

Leyla Milani is an Iranian model, actress, TV host and fashion designer. She was born in Iran and moved to Toronto when she was 4 years old. She is best known to TV game show audiences as Briefcase Model #13 on the NBC game show Deal or No Deal. She was also active in the wrestling field. Her most notable moment in the Diva Search was a wardrobe malfunction about two weeks into the program. Aside from her modeling, wrestling, and acting gigs, Leyla is also involved in the fashion world. She has her own line of hair extensions called "Milani Hair". She is married to Iranian entrepreneur, real estate investor and author, Manny Khoshbin.

When I was 14 I was walking through Tajrish Bazaar. There was one sports shop that always had soccer pictures. I noticed this time that they had a sports encyclopedia which had Zico on its cover. Although it wasn't specifically for soccer I took an interest anyway. The price was a steep 120 tomans which I quickly paid before having a chance to change my mind. I began reading and rereading through the soccer parts of it like a regular book. It enabled me to learn alot about past and present soccer players (up till the 1982 World Cup), clubs and stadiums, particularly British ones.