Absolute Random Nonsense

Going to school, albeit an international one, completely submerged me into Iranian culture. While on one hand I was able to listen in and absorb all that was being said and done around me, at the same time it gave me an idea of what my fellow students thought about the ongoings outside of the country. In one exchange, which I can’t recall whether was for or against the topic at hand, my classmate Arash asked the group of listeners gathered around him, “Do you know for how long each day they show cartoons in the US? Twenty-four hours!” For some this came as unbelievable or an exaggeration, however, others were convinced based on the signs they had already seen. Case in point on one weekend (which we quickly learned was a solitary Friday) when we were at a relative’s house, the TV was on and I immediately recognized a Saturday morning cartoon in between cartoons about a kid being lonely and singing to that effect. While most of the bit was dubbed in Persian, his singing of “I’m lonely, I...

Any fashion-conscious eye who has had a chance to see sharply fashion-savvy Iranian women in all their haute couture galore around the world (especially in Tehran), knows that Iranians are by far of the most fashionable sect on the planet. (In fact Iranians single-handedly made summer 2009, an inspiring and fiercely-emotional-yet-green one.) Now we’re delighted to introduce you to the first Iranian fashion designer, Shirin Askari, on the show of shows in fashion: Project Runway. In the words of Project Runway’s gorgeous German host, Heidi Klum: “In fashion, one day you’re in, and the next day… you’re out.” And we believe that as long as the fresh-faced designer continues to “make it work” a la’ Tim Gunn’s request, Shirin is sure to be in for a long time to come. The petite Askari won the second challenge: “We Expect Fashion” (and immunity for tomorrow night’s episode), which revolved around the designers creating a maternity dress for Hollywood actress Rebecca Romijn, on episode 2 of P...

In the mid 90s we were visiting a friend at their place. At one point he sat on a chair while his wife sat in front of him on the ground. As he spoke with us he would run his hand through his wife's hair and gently caress her head. Having gotten out of a bad breakup I watched them and thought to myself what a great relationship they seem to have and how nice it would be to have something similar although I knew I wouldn't as I had decided against ever getting married in order to prove a point.  

Majors Elham and Arezoo Barani are identical twins who, after immigrating to America to go to college, joined the Air Force. Both are dentists in the 436th Aeromedical Dental Operations Squadron here and recently were promoted to major in a dual ceremony. "It's natural to want to have the same career when you spend every moment together," said Maj. Arezoo Barani. "We wanted to become doctors since high school." "We do everything together," said Maj. Elham Barani. "We always have." The first hurdle the sisters conquered on their way to becoming doctors was the language barrier. When the Baranis came to the U.S. they knew little English. "We could say things like, 'hi, good morning, goodnight,' but nothing more," said Maj. Elham Barani. "We had no conversational skills." It took them just six months to learn English. "We watched lots of T.V., especially soap operas," said Maj. Arezoo Barani. "Actors sp...

In the summer of 1984 I went to the movies to see Gremlins. Unfortunately it was sold out and so instead we decided to watch Revenge of the Nerds. I did not understand much of the movie. For starters I didn't know what a nerd was nor was I familiar with the concept of fraternities and sororities. At the end of the movie when the black Tri-Lambs arrive I assumed they were the police. While I didn't grasp much of the story, however, I was very clear on the nudity scenes which stuck with me for years even though at each one I would get my baseball cap pulled down over my eyes until I finally removed it half way through the movie.  

Four Iranian Kurds who died trying to cross the Channel in high winds were members of one family who paid smugglers thousands of euros after two failed attempts to reach Britain, the Guardian has been told. Rasul Iran Nezhad and his wife, Shiva Mohammad Panahi, both 35, and two of their children, Anita, nine, and Armin, six, drowned as they tried to reach Britain by boat, according to a relative of the family and the Iranian-Kurdish human rights organization Hengaw. The fate of the family’s third child, 15-month-old Artin, is unknown, though French officials have said it is possible an infant also died when the vessel sank. The family was from the north-western city of Sardasht. Speaking from Sardasht, Iran Nezhad’s brother Khalil said he had last heard from the family two days ago. He said they had crossed from Iran into Turkey during the summer before proceeding through Europe to France. A representative from Hengaw said the family had attempted to enter the UK by train twice but fai...

In elementary school every day after coming home I used to watch Battle of the Planets. My favorite character was Keyop who stuttered and seemed to have a verbal tic. Years later I heard a rumor that this was done because the original character spoke using much profanity and that Keyop's excess mouth motion would cover up deleting the words. It seemed to be baseless although in the original Japanese version he spoke quite normally.  

Long before FC Bellaire was born, Arash Noamouz was building a soccer career that would take him from Iran’s top professional clubs to the international stage. Born in Tehran, Arash played for PAS Tehran, one of Iran’s most accomplished teams, earned a spot on the Iranian National Team, and represented Iran at the 1992 FIFA Futsal World Championship. In 1996, Arash became part of Major League Soccer’s inaugural season with the LA Galaxy. In the club’s very first match at the Rose Bowl, in front of more than 69,000 fans, he scored the game-winning goal and the second goal in LA Galaxy history, helping launch one of MLS’s most iconic franchises. The entire FC Bellaire World Cup experience was inspired by Arash’s lifelong love of the game and the excitement, competition, and community that make the World Cup unlike any other sporting event in the world. When you see the excitement around The ’401 this summer, know they were inspired by someone who has lived the game from the field to the ...

While in middle school a younger student came to me to see how much English I knew. He tested me with different words from his English book and then asked me for the English version of some Persian words. He asked me what پیچ was in English and a little while later, while completely butchering the pronunciation, asked me if I knew what screw screwy meant. I didn't and when he told me what it meant I was very tempted to punch him in the face for being so lame.