Absolute Random Nonsense

Despite pleas from her family to have Elnaz Hajtamiri returned home, the woman, who was 37 at the time, has not been seen or heard from since, and police believe she is dead. Investigators said three men wearing balaclavas posing as police officers with a fake warrant for Hajtamiri’s arrest ripped her from the home along Trailwood Place at about 8:30 p.m. on Jan. 12, 2022. Witnesses told police Hajtamiri was loaded barefoot into what investigators believe was a stolen white Lexus SUV. To date 11 men and women have been charged in the case. Mohamad Lilo, Hajtamiri’s ex-boyfriend, is at the center of it all, according to investigators who have charged Lilo with first-degree murder and kidnapping. Police confirmed Hajtamiri worked with Lilo, who ran a shipping container business. Arrested in Quebec months later, Lilo was brought to Ontario and has been behind bars for three-and-a-half years. He is set to stand trial for Hajtamiri’s presumed murder this spring. Lilo was convicted of ag...

In the early 2000s at the end of lunch a coworker went to dump an untouched portion of food in the garbage. I told her not to and that if she did I would reach in and take it out and eat it. I asked her if she had seen the Seinfeld episode when George had done that. She said she had. In spite of her throwing the food away I didn't fish it out of the trash. Years later though I would do so without giving anyone a heads up beforehand. Also she would die a few years after our conversation.    

The duo of Kiarash Reghabi and Christian Pierce directed and wrote ‘Types of Drunks,’ which is basically a quick tutorial of personalities anyone can expect at a party. Considering how many different drunks there are. There’s the standard orator who always talks about how drunk they are, followed by a list of booze they’ve ingested into their body. There’s the “vultures” who ninjas booze for themselves. Of course, there’s the “bro” who fist pumps, wears sunglasses indoors (not even ironically) and calls you things like “DUUUUDE" or "BRAH” -- endearingly, of course. Kiarash also worked on the Justin Bieber documentary.   

One day during math class in response to a question from Mr. Tehrani, and possibly with a promise of some kind of reward, everyone raised their hand. In our enthused state and trying our hardest to get Mr. Tehrani’s attention, many of us stood up in our seats with our arms erect and extended. Mr. Tehrani asked everyone to take their seats and seeing no results, followed it up with a threat of forcing anyone who remained standing to stand for the rest of the year. Four students refused to take their seats, welcoming the challenge of continuous standing even as Mr. Tehrani emphasized their punishment as he wrote their names down. Three of the students were Lamehpour, Eghbali and Hamidayne. I was the fourth. We were moved to the back of the class so as to not block anyone’s view. At first the four of us were thrilled about it and enjoyed the curious stares from our classmates during class as they glanced back to see if we were indeed doing this. However, towards the end of the second da...

Shahin Moghbel was on Guy Fieri's Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives. He is the owner of Chickpeas Mediterranean Café in Las Vegas. He gained recognition for his delicious Mediterranean cuisine, which led to his appearance on Guy Fieri’s popular show, Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives. His restaurant is known for its flavorful dishes and has become a local favorite, recognized as one of the best cheap eats buffets in Las Vegas. His background and culinary expertise bring a unique and authentic touch to the Mediterranean dishes he serves at Chickpeas Mediterranean Café.   Chickpeas offers a variety of Mediterranean and Indo-European dishes created by three chefs. Executive Chef Pawan Jalota, formerly of the Sensi Restaurant at Bellagio, creates exquisite and popular Indian dishes such as butter chicken, along with many vegan and vegetarian curries. The other two chefs are responsible for Mediterranean salads and main dishes, including Persian kabobs.   Chickpeas Mediterrane...

One morning for some reason Mr. Tehrani was absent and thus we were left to ourselves. It seemed like the perfect time for each group to conduct internal voting and determine who their new leader would be. Up to that point, much to my disappointment, as I considered myself a better student than him, our group leader was Vahid Siahkolah. I wasn’t so sure how I would fare in a vote as Vahid’s namesake and cousin, Behzad, was also in our group, thus guaranteeing him at least two out of six votes. We each made our case to the rest of the group as to why they should vote for us and then we all verbally cast our votes. I was assured of my own vote and that of Noroozi who sat next to me and had become close friends with me. However, much to my surprise I received one more vote from Ravani, who in turn had received a vote from Mousavi, thus leaving Vahid with only two votes. While I declared victory, Vahid claimed that there had been miscommunication and that to avoid it each person should w...

A few paragraphs into "A New Persian Empire," the prefatory essay of her new collection Brown Album, Porochista Khakpour writes: "Since 9/11, we have been living in a winter of discontent after more than three decades of discontentment." Much of the work of Brown Album is about articulating those stories of brown America that are being simultaneously lived beside, and erased from, mainstream work concerned with equating Americanness with whiteness such as The White Album. Khakpour's work is correction and visibility: about centering the brownness that has been erased from this literary cultural analysis — and accompanying conversations. There is a refreshing anger, at times, in these pages and rightfully so. Khakpour's anger is directed at erasure, at misogyny and racism, at anti-Muslim and anti-Iranian policies, at healthcare inequalities stemming in large part from environmental racism. "I loved this country," writes Khakpour. "I accepted it...

Midway through the fall semester along with my dad we went to Sharif University. As I stood outside the engineering department my dad entered and spoke with a few of the faculty and staff inside. When he finally emerged he told me, “They say you can make up the work that you have missed and that while it’s possible that you could catch up but they find it unlikely. So try it for a bit and if it seems like you can't handle it drop the courses and start from scratch next semester." And so that’s what I did. Much of the makeup work essentially consisted of me reading up on the previous material covered with the exception of English in which the professor had me translate parts of a book. There were several former classmates at the university as well that made my transition back into school a little easier. In addition to Zamiri from high school, and Shahrestani and Seyedanmalek from middle school whom I had already bumped into during orientation, I also came across Sharifasgari a...

David Halimi grew up Jewish in Tehran, watching Bonanza. He now produces rodeos in Northern California and owns a bar modeled on Cheers. At 73, Halimi is known around Chico as the man behind a Western wear store stocked with thousands of cowboy boots, a rodeo circuit that draws bull riders from across the region, and a U-shaped bar where locals joke about who might be the town’s version of Norm. Less obvious — but no less central — is that he is also a longtime synagogue president, a Hillel board leader, and a professor who teaches business analytics at the local university. Asked how an Iranian Jew learned the rhythms of the American West, Halimi doesn’t mystify it. “I’m a quick learner,” he said. For Halimi, the distance between Iran and Chico is not just geographic. It is the distance between a life shaped by instability — he grew up in Iran in the aftermath of a coup — and one he has spent decades deliberately building. Halimi didn’t arrive in America looking for a job. He arrived ...