Absolute Random Nonsense

In the mid 2000s anytime I mailed a bill I would pour a bit of coffee on the payment slip so it would leave a brown stain and I'd write a note next to it saying "Sorry I accidentally dropped this in the toilet."   

I give permission to everyone to shoot me if they ever see me waking up in a new Bugatti.

Sometimes when I'm bored I go into the garden and I cover myself in soil to pretend I'm a carrot.

I've always worked for a living. How am I gonna get through?   

It's tough getting on in the world when the sun doesn't shine and a boy needs a girl. It's about getting out of a rut. You need luck but you're stuck and don't know how.

I'm wearing a sweatshirt that is hotter than a rocket on the 4th of July.   

While George Michael and Andrew Ridgeley were part of the group Wham!, after the breakup of Wham! each released solo albums with a song containing the phrase C-c-c-c-c-come on.   

If I come any closer I might fall into your silhouette but the shape of things to come is constantly changing.

  What would you do if there was no tomorrow? And where would you go if you knew this was your last day on Earth?

Confess and you'll feel fine. And if you got the time to spare we want to know which name you're wearing.