Absolute Random Nonsense

In the 4th grade I had a classmate who would take a bow as he declared that he had built America.  

Massi, Sarah, Audrey and Mina Baghvardani, the owners of the Brown Bag Deli, say it will be the loyal customers they will miss the most when they close their establishment today after 42 years. Massi came to Oklahoma from Iran to study chemistry at Oklahoma City University. “I put myself through school by working in restaurants,” he said. And, he never quit. Massi opened the Brown Bag Deli in 1978 in Nichols Hills. Three years later, he met Sarah.  They were married 36 years ago and had daughters Audrey and Mina. Brown Bag Deli was in operation for 21 years on the plaza. The deli then moved to its second location, off of Western. The family has been serving its popular curry chicken salad, chicken lentil soup and other fresh salads, soups and sandwiches there for the last 21 years, too. Massi smoked all of his own meats. Everything was made from scratch. The Baghvardanis served a third generation of customers. “They came in when they were young and they had children,” Sarah ...

When I was a kid I used to call in the siphsifon leader.

Family Guy portrayed every Persian guy in the world as someone who wants a white BMW.

In 1989 when watching The Lost Boys I noticed Corey Feldman wore a headband. That prompted me to buy my own which also came with two wristbands.

Maky Zanganeh, who’s 54, has followed an unusual path to become a biotech CEO. She was born in Tehran, Iran, the youngest of three girls, to architect parents and was eight years old when the Shah was overthrown in early 1979. The following year, the Iran-Iraq war began. “We constantly had to face the fear of bombing,” she wrote in her 2021 memoir, The Magic of Normal . “We never knew if the bombs would hit our home or not.” When she was about 11 years old, a friend of her father’s in Germany helped get the family German visas so they could leave Iran. The difficulty was getting a flight out of Tehran, because airports were often closed. Zanganeh and her parents ended up flying to Germany via Austria, she recounts in her memoir. They lived in Oldenburg, a small town in northern Germany near Hamburg, and she learned German. Her parents ended up returning to Iran, but Zanganeh stayed in Germany for high school, first living with a friend and then with an uncle. Both of her sisters ende...

Once me and my friend had just came out of a Star Trek movie and we were laughing at ourselves for spending 8 bucks and our time on the movie (we were making jokes about the movie)... I wasn't laughing hard but this was the foundation on what was gonna happen. So I had to piss and went to the urinal. While standing there pissing and thinking of my jokes, this old fat guy came in and pulled up next to me and started pissing and let out a big FART...like ZZAAARRRRRT. So I started laughing harder and harder...then I started farting myself...and every time I laughed and my stomach contracted I farted and my piss stopped...I farted like 10 times in a row...with each laugh a fart and my piss would stop and then start again. At this point I didn't know what I was laughing at. I was laughing at the guy, the movie, my piss, my fart, my laugh. I was laughing at myself laughing and I couldn't stop. Then I tried walking but I couldn't. I was dragging myself out of the thea...

Michael Shayan's mother had a very humble reaction to seeing her son portray her on stage for the first time. "At first when I started doing it, she's like, 'Why you want to write a play about me, what that is to write?'" Shayan said with a laugh. "Now she's like, 'So what are we doing my play?' I'm like, 'Oh, it's your play now. I get it.' She's like, 'When I'm going to Broadway?'" Now, that show, Shayan’s solo “Avaaz” is beginning its national tour — in Denver. It’s not just a personal story, it’s also a Persian New Year celebration taking center stage at the Denver Center Theater Company this month. The production marks a milestone as the first major Iranian American play to be staged in Colorado. Each night, Shayan transforms into his mother Roya, hosting a traditional Norooz celebration that becomes a window into their shared story of immigration, cultural identity and family bonds. The show...

I can't believe I was able to make myself look like such a redneck. I also can't believe it's not butter.   

Does anyone know where I can find the song “Tuesday is the Best Day Ever”?