Absolute Random Nonsense

When looking for a cat to adopt we came across one that had a black small mark under its nose similar to Hitler's mustache. The cat's name was appropriately Mustachio. While we ended up going with another cat, he reminded me of myself in the 4th grade. I used to constantly bite my upper lip and leave a red mark above it. While some people called me 3 lipped, a 3rd grader, whose class our 4th grade team was scrimmaging against, responded to my trash talking by calling me sibiloo. I chased him but he was too fast for me.  

Parisa Tabriz used to be a hacker. Now she is a princess. Ms. Tabriz is a director of engineering at Google, where she oversees its Chrome web browser and a team of security investigators called Project Zero. Several years ago, when Google required her to get business cards, she picked the title “security princess” because it seemed less boring than “information security engineer,” her actual title at the time. As Ms. Tabriz climbed the ranks, the designation stuck — and reminded men in the cybersecurity field that women belonged there, too. “I want them to know that princesses can do engineering and STEM,” Ms. Tabriz said. Chrome is the world’s most widely used web browser — the window through which more than a billion people view the internet every day. Some days, Ms. Tabriz’s work at Google’s headquarters in Mountain View, Calif., entails studying furniture design (rounded chairs and felt baskets, she said, helped inspire the curve of Chrome’s tabs); at other times, she studies wonk...

During high school freshman year there was a student in my class who had this odd habit of winking instead of blinking. At first everyone thought he was intentionally doing so and it got him in trouble with teachers but eventually we realized it was not his own doing. He had a unique black jacket that had a horizontal red stripe that said "Buma" on it twice. It seemed like it was meant to be a Puma knockoff jacket and I always thought it would have looked cooler it they had instead written Burma Boy which would take up the same number of letters and in fact use most of the ones already there. His jacket enabled me to spot him on Shariati Street one day as I drove by him in a taxi after coming back from Tarh'e Kad.  

“We’re kind of like UGG boots: brown, fury, and sweaty… and nobody can figure out why we’re so damn trendy,” quips the skiing/snowboarding Iranian comedienne and regular E! commentator Nadine Rajabi in a segment of her Showtime Comedy Special, Hot Tamales about being Persian. “I’m moving back home because my mom’s been having trouble paying both [of] our rents,” says the riotous and multitasking modern Persian-beauty. As the youngest paid “regular” at the Improv clubs – thanks to Improv manager Reeta Piazza who “found” her when she was only 19 years old, at a bar trying out jokes underage – the playful Rajabi, who tells us that she’s trying to be the “Iranian Seacrest”, can now add a “producer” title, for her work on MTV’s Daddy’s Girls (a spinoff from Run’s House), to her overflowing resume. This California-raised Persian girl, is not just hilariously funny, but she’s cool and smart. She’s the type of “Persian-chick” you want to be friends with, whether you’re female or male, Persian ...

In the early 90s I watched Sandra's "Everlasting Love" video and the song got stuck in my head. Shortly afterwards I watched a French porno called  "Le Fruit du Desir" which I thought  translated to "Fruit for Dessert". Also on that tape were scenes from another porn where a girl was shown from above as the camera hovered and rotated. That night that scene began playing in my dreams coupled with the Sandra's Everlasting Love. Then I switched to a different song and when I woke up I realized I no longer remembered the tune of Everlasting Love. I asked my friends for help and one of them began humming it to me although his version sounded more like Starship's "Nothing's Gonna Stop Us Now". It would take some time before I could get my hands on a copy of the song.  

A potential cast member on Canada’s Lake Shore–a reality show where eight cast members from different backgrounds and sexual orientations move into a house together, and learn how to not step on each other’s toes–Iranian-Canadian, Roxie aka Persia, says of the forthcoming TV show: “It’s not a competition; it’s all about [our] differences!” What’s the actual Lake Shore area like? “It’s a really cool area of Toronto,” Persia tell us. “It’s literally right by the lake shore, which is also minutes away from downtown Toronto where all the hottest private parties take place.” Not just a party-girl, Persia can cook too: “I can definitely stir up a mean ghormeh-sabzi, zereshk-polo, and adass-polo!” She says in response to whether she’s planning on cooking for her would-be housemates. I would love to cook for my roommates, I think it would be a great idea, bring some Persian flavor (literally) to the show.” "I had been doing some video blogging on youtube under the name PersonalPersia when...

With the shortage of eggs, along with most other things, we were lucky to have a couple of chickens that provided us with fresh eggs daily. It was even easy to tell the eggs apart; the gray chicken laid brown eggs and the brown chicken laid white ones. We had gotten into a routine of collecting two eggs from the chicken coop every morning until it abruptly came to a halt, a fate that we all accepted. One day during science class, in order to give us a short break from actual studies, Mr. Mohammadhosseini told us another one of his stories that we certainly thought was fake. Given the topic of our lesson was plants, he went on to tell us how plants also had feelings and understanding and do much more than we give them credit for. He told us about a friend of his who had a rose bush in his yard but for the past few years it failed to fully bloom in the spring. So one day he grabbed a saw and accompanied by a friend went up to the bush and faked a conversation with his friend about ...

Holly Dagres is an Iranian analyst and commentator on the Middle East specializing on Iran with an emphasis on the intersection of security and human rights. Based in Washington, she is a Libitzky Family Senior Fellow at the think tank, The Washington Institute. Holly spent her teenage years in the Islamic Republic of Iran, from 1999 to 2006, during which time she graduated from Tehran International School.    "When I look at some of my childhood photos from the late 1990s, I can’t help but think I dressed the part of the “cool girl.” But underneath the appearance was a little girl who was constantly made fun of while living in LA.   I was too tall for sixth grade—taller than all the boys in middle school (5’10”, a height I still have today). I was also an Iranian girl, the kind who wasn’t allowed to shave her legs and was only permitted the torture of sugar waxing, which left me in tears with every strip pulled. I’d have to go to school with my legs exposed as the hair g...

I recently visited an office park and while looking at the various offices posted in the front of the building I realized that it was home to a dental office for Dr. Azadeh Dianat. Later I checked it out further and realized another dentist, Dr. Mehrnaz Golmakani also worked there. I wished I had gone there for all of the prior dental work that I had done. Although I'm not sure whether they accept my insurance.   

Jazz singer Angelina Jordan Astar has deep ties to Iran through her maternal grandmother, Mery Zamani. Born in Oslo, Angelina credits her Iranian heritage and her grandmother's background as a significant musical and artistic influence on her life. She won the 2014 season of Norway´s Got Talent, better known as Norske Talenter in Norway. After this win, and with more than 40 million combined YouTube views, she was featured in People magazine, Time , and other news outlets all around the world. In 2015, Angelina published the book Mellom to hjerter (Between two hearts) illustrated by her grandmother Mery Zamani. The book tells the story of Angelina’s meeting with a poor motherless girl in Iran to whom Angelina gives her shoes. In return the girl promises to always pray for Angelina. It’s based on a true story which Angelina cites as reason for always performing barefoot. "They were sea green ankle boots. I loved those boots. Right then and there, I felt as if a door in...